MAY 2004

Welcome to a somewhat smaller May edition of Directions - the in-flight magazine for the UK Direct group of airlines. I've had to tear myself away from playing X2 - The Threat to write this - the things I do for you lot, eh? The nefarious various franchises have had a quiet month on the surface while work is still going on behind the scenes. I have also been busy which has meant a cut down news this month, sorry!

G-UKSL A320-200 Lilani

Dean 121 has been busy with his spraycan and the first UKSun Airbus A320-200 should be available soon.
May 4th 1961 Americans Victor Prother and Malcolm Ross set a balloon altitude record when they reached 113,739 feet above the Gulf of Mexico. Prother drowned when his pressure suit filled with water after they landed.

RETURN OF THE KING

The Lord of the Scenery files has returned, donned his hat and goggles and claimed his flying gloves. Not even noticing that someone moved his chair, drank his coffee and redocorated the office!

Welcome back to the creator of the One VA to rule them all: Gary (UKD100) Summons. Briefly: for those who weren’t around a few years ago Gary forged UK Direct in the crack of Mount Doom before reshaping the rest of the world; creating the UK2000 scenery. http://www.uk2000scenery.com/puplic/index.htm

Apparently the Elves aren’t as troublesome now and he has managed to log a few hours ferrying Lambis bread to Mirkwood’s Galadriel International Airport.

Isle Of Man – Ronaldsway Airport is the latest to bend to his will :)  A free demo is available at the above site.
4th May 1996 When George Hook of Brainerd, Minnesota, forgot to unlatch one of the chains attaching his helicopter to his truck, his helicopter jerked downward, the rotor blades carved into the cab of his truck, and landed upside down. He came away unhurt.
5th May 1994 While walking along the Derbyshire moors near Laneside, England, a couple saw a huge World War II airplane weaving to the left, clearly in trouble only 40 to 50 feet above the moor. He ran over the hill, expecting to see a crash but instead saw only a peaceful meadow with sheep grazing. His sighting was only a few feet from where a U.S. Air Force Dakota crashed in July 1945. Others have reported similar experiences in this area -- the ghost of the Dakota.

PLANECRAZY UPDATES

“This month i’m mostly.......” playing X2 :)

But I found time earlier to add the Saab 340/2000 history and Madeira gallery

BUSY MONTH FOR NEWS

May seems to have more than its fair share of news. Click below to visit a website with a video clip of the Hindenburg disaster..
6th May 1937 The German zeppelin Hindenburg burned at its mooring at Lakehurst, New Jersey. 36 people died in the fire. click text for more detail
8th May 8 1997 The pilot-side windshield on a private Gulfstream 3 jet blew out 2 1/2 hours into a flight from Miami to France. The pilot was able to land at Bangor, Maine, where he picked up another jet. The cabin of the jet never lost pressure so no passengers were hurt in the incident. Actor Sylvester Stallone, who was aboard the plane on his way to the Cannes Film Festival, said
14th May 2000 A woman was injured when a Russian helicopter plunged into the woods near her home in southern Russia. As the helicopter went down it hit electric cables which caused it to fire rockets into her apartment. All 15 men aboard the helicopter were also hurt in the crash but amazingly (and thankfully) no-one was killed.
23rd May 23 1997 A teenage boy discovered the body of a man who had apparently fallen from the wheel well of an airplane about to land at Miami International Airport in Florida. The man had apparently been a stowaway on an international flight. At least thats the official story - Personally I want a word with Calum
24th May 23 1996 A jaguar being transported from Amsterdam, Netherlands, to Mykolayev, Ukraine, broke free from its cage and roamed free through the cargo hold. When baggage handlers at the Lviv, Ukraine airport opened the hold, they were greeted by the 10-year-old jaguar. The plane's passengers were evacuated and the plane was flown to Kiev, where zoo keepers and animal trainers were waiting to subdue the jaguar.
26th May 23 2003 An airplane carrying Spanish peacekeepers back from Afghanistan crashed into a fog-covered mountain in northeastern Turkey. All 75 people aboard the plane were killed.

And Finally.....
29th May 1997 A Dutch pilot was jailed for four months for singing the Flintstone's theme song over his small plane's radio in March of 1996. His singing tied up a radio frequency used by air traffic controllers at the Groningen, Netherlands airport and tied up air traffic for 20 minutes while the pilot sang,

Pass this around; I can't believe the cheek of these large corporations.

 In article <4klht8$h16@ns.mad.servicom.es>, Cristobal Castro wrote:
 Hello!, somebody has, or know how to have, plans of Boeing 747 airplane.


 Boy, are YOU in luck!

 A while back, I went and toured the 747 assembly plant in Everett,Washington. The Boeing 747 is a fantastic airplane, surely a marvel of our age.
 I was so impressed that I thought, "Hey, I wonder if *I* could build one of these?" So I went up to the tour guide and asked her if plans of the
747 were available.

 "They sure are," she said.

 "Great! How much?"

 "Five hundred big ones."

 Hey, I thought. Heck, Falco plans cost almost five hundred bucks, and here I'd be able to carry a lot more passengers a lot faster. So I handed over
 my VISA gold card and went home with a complete set of gen-u-wine construction drawings for a Boeing 747-421.

 Two days latter, I was sweeping my shop, getting ready for the big project. Not that it *really* needed cleaning, of course, but I figured the 747
would take a few clecos, and sweeping the floor is a good way to gather up the loose ones.

 Anyway, a Fedex truck drove up, with a statement from American Express. I nearly flipped. The plans for the 747 weren't five *hundred* dollars...
Boeing had charged me *$500,000*!!!!!! I mean, heck, the plans came in a nice set of a dozen mahogany file cabinets, but that doesn't make them worth half a million dollars.

 I immediately called Boeing, of course. I offered to return them. "Uh-uh," they said. "How do we know you haven't been running XeroxT copies for the
 last couple of days? If we take the plans back, that doesn't mean you won't be taxiing a brand new Wanttaja 747 out of your garage two years from now,
 won't it?"

 I coulda died! I settled down on the couch, stunned. It was just like the time I'd bought the Mrs. Field's recipe, and the Red Velvet Cake one before
 that. HOW can these companies keep taking advantage of the hard-working American consumer?

 But then it hit me: Heh, heh, I'll get back at Boeing, the same way I got my revenge on the cookie people: I'll POST the entire construction plans to the Internet!

 So here is Part 1 of 17,321 on "Building Your Own 747":

 For Part 1, you will need:

 100,000 sq. ft of .040 Aluminum, alloy 7075T-6
 2,000 gallons of BMS-142 Alodyne
 40,000 Scotch-Brite (tm) pads
 1 American French Pumper Truck, 500-gallon capacity
 1 GMC Trent Division Street Sweeper, Model ST-401
 1 pair tin snips
 55 Gallons rubber cement
 You'll also need a large, flat area (preferably indoors) about 400 feet square. If outdoors, you want REALLY short grass.
 Note: When buying the aluminum, make sure your rolls are *at least 12-feet wide*. DO NOT let the vendor supply you with 12-inch-wide rolls! These are for gutters.

 Step 1: Lay the Aluminum flat in the working area.

 Step 2: Attach the Scotch-BriteT pads to the buffers on the GMC Sweeper.


 Step 3: Drive the sweeper over the aluminum, buffing to a dull sheen.Replace the Pads as necessary.

 Step 4: Load the alodyning solution into the Fire Truck.

 Step 5: Let stand 25 minutes.

 Step 6: Flush the alodyne off with tap water, let dry.

 Step 7: Flip the aluminum over (you may want to have a friend help) and repeat.


 Step 8: Print out the part layout diagram included at the end of this posting.


 Step 9: Paste the layout diagram to the aluminum using the rubber cement.

 Step 10: Cut the parts out using the tin snips.

 Next week: Part 2 covers corrosion proofing. Keep your eyes open for used cattle troughs, etc, to help apply the zinc chromate.


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 PARTS LAYOUT PATTERN
 The following pages will print out the outline of all the .040" aluminum parts for the 747 on the standard output. Numbers are printed in the corners of each page... tape the pages together, overlapping the appropriate numbers.
 ACCURACY IN THIS PHASE IS VITALLY IMPORTANT! Part numbers are also included.

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 CUT TO THIS LINE
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 1 2
 |-------------------------------------------------| |-----------
 | Part D545-70021 Port Outer Rib #1 | |
 | | | Part D54
 | | |
 |SYSTEM TIMEOUT ERROR...PRINTOUT ABORTED...#%*(@########

 

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